- Say No: It’s Ok to say no sometimes and check in with your body and mind. Do you need a night in a bubble bath and a movie after a very long and stressful week? Then do that. If you find you are often agreeing to things you really do not want to do or have every weekend booked up with obligations which leave you feeling exhausted and pissed off, book a weekend for yourself.
- Breathe: Learn some deep breathing techniques, grounding visualisations and body relaxation techniques. These can be applied anywhere and anytime and are the most effective way to reduce stress and anxiety. Check-in with your body, are you holding your breath or breathing too quickly? Are your shoulders tight and tense and hunched up? Take five minutes, relax the body and breathe deeply realising the breath. Make this a daily practice so it becomes automatic.
- Me time: Finding those activities that rejuvenate and reduce stress. Those times when we lose the sense of time and can be focused and free of anxiety. If you haven’t found that actively look for it. It could be windsurfing, rock climbing, painting, singing, or dancing. Turn off Netflix. Book one evening a week for you. Know what activities reduce stress and give you a break. Take time at least once a week to do this. Do an activity that is yours. We often get lost in our work, families and the general balancing act of life.
- Boundaries: Know your boundaries. If something does not feel OK for you, say something. Self-care and self-love are the same things. You deserve to have your feelings heard and respected. Recognise where your boundaries are and practice making others are when something is not right or doesn’t feel OK for you.
- Look after your body: Check in with the body, are you eating well. Is your body exhausted and being pushed to the limit? Do you need to rest? Do you need to exercise more? Change your diet? Your body won’t lie to you. It will let you know what it needs.
- Create a self-care list: Construct your own personal list of healthy ways to make you feel good. Reading, Meditation, and Listening to uplifting podcasts, and music. Create that list and recognise when you need to use it. Some clients create a self-care box and add things to it that symbolise self care-like photos, poems, and memories.
- Self-care means Do It Yourself: Don’t expect others to monitor what you need. Check in with yourself, identify what you need and go out there and get it. Want your partner to surprise you for once with flowers? Go and buy yourself a beautiful bunch, you deserve them. Want an evening away from the kids, organise it. Stop waiting for someone else to give you the want you need. You are giving away your power and your own ability to get your needs met. You do not need to ask others for self-care.
- Seek support: If you wanted to lose weight, you’d join a gym or book a personal fitness instructor. If you want a night off, book a babysitter and get out there. If you are struggling with anxiety, depression, addictions, or trauma goes see a therapist you gel with. Go for those changes that are important to you, that you want to make for yourself and devise a plan of action, enrol others to guide and support.
